Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Imajin Me an Mai Onkul Pullin a Goddiss’z Sled…
In the intrist of offrin yu all “ALTER-NA-TIV” ideers about gods and the yooneevers an stuff, I is now goin to tell yu about anothr DEE-IT-EEE whu has speshul relayshunship wift kittee peeples. So if yu looks at yer glob, an yu goz up abuv Yoorup, yu wil see Skandanayveea. It has a buntcha cuntrees, lik Finlun, Sweedin, Norwae, an Denmark. An mebbe Icelund—I’m still not cleer on that. Now whut theez contreez shayr is a old beleef in theez Nors Godz. (They calls them Nors eevn tho onlee 1 countree calld Norwae. Dun’t asks me why.)
The onlee importint 1 of theez deeiteez is calld Freya. She is the goddis of luv, byootee, an fertilitee (which is about havin yer kidz). Parentlee, Freya is blonde an blu-eyd an byooteeful, jus lik mai mom. Altho mom’s hair isn’t as blonde as it yoozd to be, an also, how kin sombodee be byootiful if they hasn’t got mutch furr? She onlee has it on hed. Seem sillee to me. Huh. Of cors I thingk she pertee, but she mai mom. Is natchrul.
Aneewae, Wikerpeedier say that “Freyja often rides on a chariot drawn by a pair of large cats. She rode this chariot to Baldur's funeral. These cats are called Gib-cats in the Prose Edda. They are thought to be either Norwegian forest cats  or Lynx. Cats are sacred to Freyja, just as wolves are to Odin.” (“Freyja”). They doesn’t egsplayn whut a Gib is or whut the diffruns is between 49 Norweejun forist kittees an a singul Lynx.
Mom sez, “Wull, yu noe, it’s jus Wikerpeedier. Yu kin’t hav evrthin.”
An I ges shee’z rigt.
But I kin’t halp thingkin of me an mai Onkul Me2 pullin the sled of som goddis across the snow lik in them piktchurz… She had betterer not be mor than, say, 20 pounz. Yu noe, jus a littul goddis…