Tuesday, July 16, 2013

A Pupu Platter Is Not Akshully What Yu Think

Musashi Sez:

So I has been hanging out wift Captain Crunch on some Polynesian Islands in Mom’s closet this week, an we has had lots of fun. We looked fer buried treasure, but all we found was innerestin smelling socks, most of which didn’t eevn match. So the captain told me stories about Tiki gods, whu are these little wooden guys wift big heads an little feets. Parently, they live on all these islands in the Seven Seas an so when they wants to visit each other they hops into a little boat an float over to their neighbor’s house on another little island. An since they mostly spends time in the boats an not walkin, their legs is small from not usin them like I does, fer jumpin on tables an like that.
Also they wear bright shirts wift flowrs. Mom gots a blue one. We’re tryin to find a pertee pink one in my size, but it seem like them Hawaiaain shirt websites discriminate against kitteez, which is perty dumb since tiki is just kittee inside out. Yu’d think they’d have lots of customers if they were smarter.

Oh yeah! An also they wear these perty necklaces made out of akshul flowers! An drink out of akshul coconuts! An they eets lots of pinapples, which if yu see a picture of one, yu wud think it was a made-up fruit, but parently, it akshullee exists. An that’s why they call it Polynesia, cuz “poly” is Greek for “lots” and “nesia” is Greek for “weird stuff.”

Saturday, July 6, 2013

A Tropikul Vacation from Piratin

Musashi Sez:

Captain Crunch an me has becomed gud friends sinse the Fourth of July when we tuk tim off from figting to hide from all them fireworks explosions which were verree distractin an scary. Aftr we finished the 6-pack of root beers, he taught me a pirate song (he called it a sea-chantey), that went lik this:

O! The pirate’s life is very fine!
The gold that once was yours is mine!
Yo ho ho an a bottul of rum!
The pirate’s life is a lot of fun!

There was more stanzrs, but I fergetted them. An after each stanza we dance around and then fall down giggling, which I was akshully verree gud at, hnrf, hnrf, hnrf. I has a killer giggle.

So after all that hornpipin an giggling, me an Captain Crunch has decided to call off that whol figtin to the death thing that were planning on doin. Turns out this dancing stuffs is much more fun. Huh.

Friday, July 5, 2013

Our Cease-Fire fer Sword-Figtin

Musashi Sez:

Well, me an Captain Crunch were all “Have atchu!” an clacketty-clack an like that, but then Mom came home an reported that they had been putting the scary barge in the Charles River to prepare fer the Fourth of July Indpendence Day celrbrations. An that is nevr gud nooz to me! Like most of us 4-feeted folks, I finds LOUD POPPING AND BANGING NOIZEZ MOST DISCONCERTING!

So I talked to Mr. Crunch an he agreed we shud has whut the army folks call a “cease-fire” although I not noe what they call it if yu is using swords. But we hads that while mom went out to a barbecue.
She leftid root beers in the fridge fer us an we got quite merry. All that fizzy stuff in yer nose? Huh. Yu never eevn notis the annoyin LOUD NOIZES at all.