Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Todae is the beginning of the end of spring. So this lik the 12 Daez of Crismuss fer the befor-summr crowd.
Fer instins, I sillee-braytid this mornin at Sun-Riz* by dansin the Hokee-Pokee on mai Mom’z hed. She wuz veree gud about the whol thin, cuz she unnerstan richoolz. Parentlee, the Hokee-Pokee orijinaytid from this Ceiling Cat servis-thin frum the Middul Ayjiz, wen they sedz, “Hokee-pokee, heer com Jeezus.” An the peeplz whu wuz bizee prayin ther lookt up to see.
This is tru. I noe cuz mai mom tookt a class about Ceiling Cat Richoolz wift this gy Rick McCall, an I sleepd on her books.
So if yu gits a chans tomorrer morning, yu noez whut yu needz to do: Yu puts yer lef paw in, yu tayks yer lef paw owt, yu puts yer rigt paw in an yu shayks it all about. An lik that. Wift all yer paws, an yer hed, an eerz, an tayl.
Then it’s offishul the beginnin of the end of spring.
*Aroun egzaktlee 4:37 a.m.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Wull the dae afor yestrdae wuz Cinco de Meow, the dae wen, if yu livs in Meksiko, yu’r sposta be all graytful fer yer 9 lives. An yu eets cookeez wift skellingtons on them. I thingk it the heet that they gets in Meksiko that mayks them eet skellington cookeez. It make them stretch out egstra doorin their siestas and their brains gets a littul meltee.
Meenwhil, mai mom is workin on a noo projekt, this one on eekologee. This is lik how she com hom havin learnd about the Grayt Pasifik Garbudg Patch an she sez, “Eeek eek, hoominz is jus bad peepulz!!!!” An then I has to talk her down.
Then, wen she gets a littul calmr, she scoop me up an hug me an puts her noez aginst my tummee an muttrs about how I’m her buddee an she will sayv the werld fer me, an lik that.
Som daez is hardr werk than othrz, bein a kittee, that’s all I’m sayin.
Aneewae, I incuridgez her to werk on her eekolojee projekt, as it migt mayk her less scayrd of hoomin peepulz. I NOT wants her scardypants of hoominz. Hoominz is the peepulz what mayks kittee fud, an littr, and moussee toyz an lik that. So I werks to let her gets mor curridge.
Eevn if it meen she squeez me an talks to my tummee…. Huh!