Whoops!

Musashi Sez:

Wull, coller mai eerz pink! Aftr four solid weeks of perpayrin fer Leep Dae! by runnin! verree fast! across the parmint! an in an out of boxiz!, I went an slept rigt throo it, neerlee all dae. Huh.

Mom sez this a verree commin mistayk calld “Ovr-Traynin,” an athletes lik me has to be cayrful about it. She sez that’s why marathon runnrz tayk days off befor they run down the street in Aprul. Also, parintlee, there something about psaghetti too, tho I not see how eetin noodulz will help you run bettrer.

Anneewae, I tayk all this undr advys fer mai perpayrin fer the Lympics that are comin up, it bein an eevn yeer.

I noe I can’t beet the Japineez teem at Box Jumpin, cuz they totallee rocks that sport, ther bein a lot less spayce in Japan than ther is heer. Also, their most faymussest athleet, the Scottish-Fold Round-Belly Kitteh named Maru is lik the TigerWoods-MiaHamm-CarlosCastenada of Box Jumpin. So altho Mom gottid me a big box to practis in, I hav been focussin more on them horizontul sports, rathr than them vertikul onez.

Cuz I kin totally tayk hom the shinee medul fer sprintin. Ther ar no wae that Maru kin catch me, cuz I am wae skinnier than him, an also I has the ligtnin pawz! Them two things shud leed me to gettin that fansee tinfoyl medal fer sprintin.

Also, I am accidentallee well-restid. Huh.

The Ironee of Leepin!

Musashi Sez:

Wull, this last week or 2 hav been a verree bizzee tim an no mistayk, altho it hav been diffruntlee bizzee dependin on whu yu talks to. Mom has been typin, tappittee-tap. I, on the othr paw, has been leepin! jumpin! raycin across the partmint! climbin fil cabinuts, an also nappin in verree athletik wayz.

All of this is me, Musashi the Athleet, perpayrin fer the Lympiks, which natcherullee start on Leep! Dae, which ar todae, Febrooayree 29th, a day that don’t come evr yeer, mutch less evr dae. Huh.

Also Mom mostlee finished her theesis. I halped wift the Bibbulogogrophee, which is mor compulkaytid than yu’d lik to thingk. But it all done now, in part cuz I JUMPT up on Mom’s desk whil she wuz werkin on it.

This wuz one of them Motivayshunul Jumps.

Yah. Is a derty job, but I kin always lik off afterwerdz.

The Boringness of that Gigantic Boet, and Also Simptomz

Musashi Sez:

Wull Mom has ben typin—tappity tappity—about that Gigantic Boet thing. Parrintlee, her adviser-gy tolded her to thin out the descrpshun bits, lik combin mai furr an coming out wift big egsitin balls’ o’ furr, but wiftout eethr the egsitingness or the akshul furr. Verree borin. But she sez that soon she’ll be working on the Ark bits, which have much more furr an also jirafs an zeeebraz, whu is by definishun egsityin, cuz of the necks an the stripeez.

(Thogh mebbe yu nuu that.)

So it not so hopless as it migt soun. Also, she is mosly doin less of that hed-splodin sneezery or the jus annoyin cougfin stuffs.

Which is verree gud, cus aftr all, I needz mai beautee sleeps, lik at leest 16 hors a day. An how can I do that when the knee on which I sleeps (when it dark) is doin this whol corfa-corfa-corfa….Gzdnkapowww! Corfa!

Huh.

Bein Trickee wift Theesis Stuffs

Musashi Sez:

Wull, mai mom hads com up wift the 50 payjiz her perfessrz wantid. Hoorah, I thogt. But now they sez she has to forcast mor an re-arraynj lotsa stuffs. An it all has to happen by the middul of nex week! Ridicyoolus!

I wud rewrit all of it, if onlee I had thems hypr-activ thumz. It verree annoyin that I doesn’t have them, no mattr how manee blogs I writ, or how manee hours of “food channul” kitchin activitee I watchiz. Verree stupit if you aksks me.

Huh.

Mom is jus lukkee that I not lik them othr kitteez whu gives their hoomin companyunz lotsa trubbulz.

Allerjeez, Runnin Praktis, an also Shrub Toozdae

Musashi Sez:

Wull, ferst I’d lik to point out that it ar 02/21/2012, an if yu wayts a few hors ther will be eevn mor of them 1s and os an 2s. But I not goin to, cuz by then I’ll be sleepin.

It hav been another bizzee week! Mom wuz bizzee scribbling an I wuz bizzee racin! verree fast! across the partmint! We has a noo roommayt, named Jayn, an she is pertee cool. She let me nap in mai chayr in her room when she doesn’t need to be typin.

Mom thogt she wuz sik this weekend, but now we thinks it wuz jus allerjeez, cuz she kept sneezing so hard I thogt her hed migt splode! But it din’t, so that’s OK.

Also, parintlee, todae is Shrub Toozdae, so she went ovr to skool fer pancayks fer dinnr, which mayk no sens to me. Pancayks is fer brekfist. Not that Mom evr mayk me them. (Altho, as she point out, I not mayk them fer her eethr, so fayr’s fayr.)

Mor importintlee, what has brekfist fud gots to do wift shrubs, an why they eets them fer dinnr?

Mom sez that holidaez are verree offin about turning stuffs upsid-down, and that why she goin to this skool in the ferts plays, cuz they liks doin the upsid-down thin.

Huh. Upsid-down. Next yu noe, she goin to be doin Yoger!

Perpayrin fer Leep! Yeer Dae

Musashi Sez:

Wull, it has ben a bizzee wek or 2 an no mistayk. Mom has ben writin an thingkin, and I hav ben leapin! an runnin around! and nappin, so we have ben werkin verree hard to looz wayt and get strong an also that whol “theesis” thin. Mom sez that if I did mor of the writin, then she cud do mor of the nappin, which wud be betterer. Persnlee, I thinks that we shud boft do mor of sittin in small boksiz, but I figgr she won’t agree so I doezn’t bring it up.

An aneewae, the Leap! Year Olympiks is this yeer, so I has to mayk shur my Leapin! is gud enugf fer the innernashunnul competishuns.

Too bad Mom’s theesis has nofthin to do wift the leepin! Cuz I cud reellee halp her if it did. Huh.

Musashi: Theesis Coatch Extrordinarlee

Musashi Sez:

So mai mom is writin her theesis, wich ar a reellee big paypr wift argyoomints in it. Hers is moslee about good ol’ Noah, whu we reellee liks, an also som big ol ship naymed “Reelee Big Ship,” whut sinkd 100 yeerz ago. It is verree faymus, eevn tho I had not heard of it befor. Parintlee, they has eevn mayd mooveez about it. Huh.

But eevn tho mai mom has writid theeseez (this the ploorul of theesis, go figgr) befor—2 of them eevn—this one is givin her the crayzeez. Seems lik her othr onez wuz fikshun storeez, verree long. This one she can’t jus mayk up, an it onlee 50 payjiz, which is lik about 2.7777 timz all mai set of toez.

Now if ther one thin I has lernd about writin this heer blog, it is eezier to writ somthin long than somthin short, moslee cuz if yu writs short, peeples payz attenshun to the whol darn thin an all its deetaylz. If yu writs long, they just skims an yu kin gets awae wift, fer instins, creativ spellin an grammr.

So mai mom is jus suffrin. It tookt her 9 hours to writ 3 and a haf payjiz, which isn’t eevn one back paw! So I reelizd that it wuz mai dootee to halp her.

Don’t git me rong. I ben halpin all along, yu noe, sittin between her an the kapyutr skreen to mayk shur them radeeayshun wayvs doezn’t overwelm her. But it was tim to tayk mai gaym to a whol noo bottul of gummeewerms! Yus.

Now mai mom somtimz giv talks about writin yer theesis or dissertayshun (which iz the dance verzhun of the theesis). I has sleepd on her notcards, so I noe all the thins yu has to do. I tell yu her roolz an how I halpd her.

1) Stay Wadderaytid. Evrytim I went into the bedrum where she wuz typin, I drinkd out of my wadder fountain, cuz it jus lik yawnin and stretchin. If one persin does it, evrboddee start doin it.

2) Stay Egzersized. This was fun, cuz I got to be spy-lik AN athletik. Ther she’d be, sittin at the kapyutr, wift her bak to the dor an I’d com runnin! in an jump up behind her an smak her on the bak of the hed. (It not eezee to get a typin-peeple’s attenshun. Yu gots to put in the effert.) Then she say, “Huh. Musashi! Yu rigt. We needz to plae.” An then she’d chays me out of the rum an play sokkr wift me.

3) Rembember that Writin is Hard. I gets on the desk an I murmurz into her mouft, “It not eezee bein brillyunt writrz lik we is. But we suffrs fer our art, yus?” An of cors, she agree wift me.

4) Keep Singin. This a no braynr. Which is yoosful, unner the circumstensiz.

5) There was another thin, but I needed to nap, so I fergettid it. But wen she finlee clapse on the bed, I snuggle up to her nee an goez to sleep wift her. Solidity wift the suffrin is verree importint, theolojiklee speekin.

If yu is writin yer theesis too, yu shud get a frend to do thees thins fer yu!