Breathin the Walk

Musashi Sez:

Recentlee, lotsa folks has sendid me hugz via emayl, an of cors, I has sendid them bak purrs, an hed rubs, an also a qweree about whut their breft smell lik, cuz fer kittee peeples this is importint infermayshun. I has got interesting results.

My mom’s breft alwaes smell lik orinj joos in the mornin. My granmom sez her breft smell lik tooftpayst. An whil I noe that this is the sorta thin hoomin peeples valyoo, cuz of the “mintee freshnis,” I gotta say it mayk me gag. Kyak! Kyak! Up com a hayrball! This not persnul. Mai mom tried to get me to lik som diffrint flayvrz of kittee tooftpayst, but it all disgustin, eevn the sammon kind. Which showz jus how bad this stuff is. Mai mom yooz hoomin peeple tooftpayst that she sez tayst lik “mint” an she sez “mint” is relaytid to “catnip.” An lotsa mai toys got that “old catnip flavr” but that isn’t neerlee lik the stuff in her mouft. Bleh.

On the othr paw, my wuns-an-fyootchr roommayt, Carlos sed his breft smelld lik BAR-B-Q. This soun hopful to me. I am lookin forerd to wen he com bak in Sptembrer, so I kin find out mor about this bar-b-q thin. It soun lik it migt smel OK!

MisQwot of the Dae: Tell me whut yer breft smel lik an I’ll tell yu whu yer frendz ar.

Livin wift Somboddee Whu cud Mayk Starz

Musashi Sez:

So mai mom is writin a skreenplae, which is a skrpt fer a moovie. She wrotid a movie befor but noboddee wantid it an it wazn’t her ideer to begin, so that don’t mutch matter. But this 1 is diffrunt. It has not got a kittee in it yet, but I gots the high hops becuz, hay, it is mai mom who is writin it, an she hav verree gud tayst. In payntin, yu kin tell the gud tayst by all the cherribs an the pillerz: the mor cherribs an pillerz, the mor tayst—eezee.

Film is a hardr meedyum. Yu got to has kitteez, but of cors kitteez is hard to catch an eevn hardr to convins to do lotsa “tayks” of a sceen.

Whut I has ben tryin to get thruhg mai mom’s limited mentul capasty is that I has a verree high tolerins fer sittin still wift a arrowgint luk on mai fays. But she keep thingkin of me as a “gud kittee,” a “nys kittee”—huh!

How am I goin to giv Lassee a run fer her munnee if I can’t eevn convins mai mom that I am star mateeryul?

Mai Nooest Professhun Iddeer

Musashi Sez:

Mai Mom resentlee went to Conneckiticutucut to vizit my gramfolks. On her wae ther an bak, she runnd into som Conduktrz, whu ar verree kool, an she toldid me about them. So now, mai caree-er gol is to becom a Trayn Conductr, cuz yu getz a cool littul hat an they lets yu put holz in peeples’s tikits.

An altho Mom didn't sae this, I bet if the folks don't hav tikits, they probabul let yu puts holz in teh peeples!!!

Kin yu imajin a job lik that?

Summr Ar Heer, Almos

Musashi Sez:

I noe I has ben a Bozo fer not writin enugf, but I has ben werkin on a song fer yu. It about summr. It is dinnr myoozik. I hoeps yu lik it. Yu gots to imajin that Leena Horn chick singin, cuz she got styl. An losta them saxifonz or whatevr it is they yooz to mayks peeple thingk about summr blooz myoozik.


Dinnr tiiiim and the livin is eeeezee.
The toonr'z jumpin: the pile of nomz is so high! (so high)
Mai mom’z not ritch, and she shur is not furreeee,
But hush, now, kittee, do-o-o-on’t yu craiii!

One of theez morninz, yu goin to wayk up singin.
Yu’r goin to spred yer kittee wingz an go flyin, so high. (high)
Until that morning, ain’t nothing kin harm yu. (No)
Whyl Mom an her roommeez is standin baiiiii. (Standin baiii)


(Fer me, I lets Mom sing an I jus lash mai tail in tim, lik I do wen she play that Myl Daveez fellr wift the trompet. Yu gotsta get reelee, reelee cool. Yu jus werk on that coolnis thing. Yu gots alllll summr to do it.)

Curiosity: Mom’s Got Ternip-Braynz, So I Needz Yer Halp!

Musashi Sez:

Wull, heer we ar at the verree end of the Eevl Spring Smestr, an mai mom is finishin up her payprz an egzamz an stuff. We has ben pumpin Oksijen throo her brayn via them X-Fylz I toldid yu about, cuz it turn out that they has Medissinol effex. Or somthin lik that.

But it still not bak to norml aroun heer, an it won’t be until Toozdae at the erliest.

So I am goin to need yer halp. Yus, YU!

Now first yu has to noe that I am assoomin that yu all NOT got the Ternip Brayn Sindrum. If yu does has it, then don’t email us, cuz that won’t werk so gud. Sekund, yu has to unnerstan that we has a constint awdiens heer, that egspekt verree high an impressive ennertaynmint standerds.

So: What shud I be talkin about on this heer blog until mai mom gets bak to her hoomin peeple brayn agin? Cuz I has rund out of ideerz.

If yu lets us noe whut yer intrists ar, we will not onlee writ about them and we will also tell folks that it wuz YU who sugjestid it to us!!!

Fame!

So give us a showt!!!

Lov,

MUSASHI

No Pololojyzin! Jus Runnin!

Musashi Sez:

Mom has poyntid out to me that I had sed I wuz goin to tell yu mor about Eestr an that stuff, but it wuz too borin. (Ceiling Cat son got 2 livz? Whut so egsytin about that? We kitteez all gots 9!) So in the intrist of keeping the ennertaynmint valyoo of this blog up to yer verree egzaktin standerds, I throo that plotline out.

Mom “sugjestid” that I pololojyz fer havin misled yu foks, but I onlee pololojyz fer skratchin folks. An I not skratch yu. Ther no wae in reel lif to skratch somboddee via the innerwebs, altho I thingk ther migt be a X-Fyl sho about that, com to thingk of it. But that jus TV. That not reel. So if yu want me to scratch yu, yu’r goin to hav to com down heer to Blak Caboos Stoodioz, wher I kin reetch yu wift my akshul paws.

It also okkoor to me that I fergettid to tell yu about how hundreds an hundreds of peeples ran past mai hous a coupla weeks bak, durin the “Boston Marathon,” which is this rays wher peeples try an run reellee far so the firstist one gets to tell them librareenz ovr at the Boston Libraree that the war in Grees is ovr. I not compleetlee unnerstan why they has to do this, but it is kinda cool if yu win cuz yu gets a crown mayd of leevz that yu kin eet on the playn rid hom.

An yah, it do seem kinda stooped, but akshul, I ben inspyrd by them crazee peeplez, an in their onner, I ben runnin aroun the hous nonstop on an off fer weeks now. Mom sez this is becuz I got springz in mai legs, or meebbee jus becuz it is spring. I din’t foller that bit eethr. It hard to follr an egsplinayshun wen yu gots to be runnin

AWAE!

Liddul Green Gyz

Musashi Sez:

Mai mom an I has noo hobbeez. Hers is watchin The X-Fylz rerunz on her kapyuter an myn is walkin between her an the kapyootr screen whil she’z doin it.

This is not so eezee as it soun, cuz I has to tim it jus rigt, so that jus befor ther is a scaree soun, I has to be reddee to jump! up on her desk an skayr her wits out. Huh.

Yu problee not noe this TV sho. It wuz on televizhn yeerz an yeerz ago, wae befor I eevn got bornd! It’s about liddul green gyz wift big blak eyz comin down from othr planets to tayk ovr the wurld an theez 2 FBI peeples whu stops them. Or possiblul it about theez govermint peeplez whu is tryin to taky ovr them liddul green gyz, an the FBI peeplez is tryin to find evidints that they’r doin it. Also, somtimz ther is vampyrz, werwulfs, gosts, cereal killrz an lik that. Mom spendz a lot of tim laugfin.

An then she sihg reellee big an go bak to writin her payprz fer skool. An I go bak to seeruyus biznis of nappin.

Huh. Mai lyf. It onlee luk eezee from the outsid.