Whut I Did This Summr

So I tookt the summr orf to be a Gentulman of Leezhur an writ mai furstest novul. This is a novul of adventchur, wift chays sceens and pirates and lotsa derring-do, which are the sortsa things yu kin expect from a novul, especially if it is writed by ME. I had to hide mai writin from Mom, cuz she is a English teetcher an they ar known to be perticular about things lik spellin an plots an tranzitions an stuffs. An I didn't want her to be crampin mai style. So I writed in one of her old notebooks wift my trustee purpul crayon (except I did the fightin sceens in red and the long, borin descriptions that nobody reads in green).

But then I went to try an type it up and it just no good typin wift paws. The keys are too little and it takes ferever to get to the end of a sentence if I try to type wift just one toe. So I hadsta admit to Mom about mai Novul an aksksd her to type it fer me. She was verree surprized, because she thought I had spent the summer jus lyin around.

This could not be furtherer from the trooth. I was imaginatin like crazy. Sometimes, I sat in her compyuter chair and jus stared at the compyuter fer hours. Parently, lots of novulists do this. At one point I asksd Mom if I could have a cup of corfee (preferable in her ninja mug), but she said that it would stunt my growth or somthin. So mai novul migt not akshullee be as EXCITIN as I had planned.

Once the Furniture Is Bak to Normul...

Musashi Sez:

So the landlords is "bringin the parmint up to code" which apparently mean cutting holes in all the walls and som of the ceilings and making us move the furnichur when my friend Jack isn't actually makin another moovie. I keep lookin to see if ceilin cat reelly is watchin, but maybe his is on vaycayhshun. Meanwhile, I has been making plans for my summer.

Chaysin the Red Dot, a epic pome by ME

Musashi Sez:

Well, Mom just toldid me that one of the reezons she has been writin an writin is that it is Aprul an that is National Poetree Monft. So she is writin her epic poem, which is a long pome about epic deeds. So I thoughtid that I would get in on the actshun. Wish me luck.

I pat the Muzes on the arm, repeatedly

To get their attenshun: Lo, the red dot

Will not chayse itself. I must do the deed!

They pay me no attenshun, so I pull

Wift my claws on their fansee white skirts.

What ho, fair muse? It is time to chayse

The red dot, an then writ fansee poetrees

About it. Why are yu pickin me up an throwin

Me out of the muse hall? That not fair!

The red dot MUST BE CHASED. I am goin

To tell my mom on you ladies! Yu are

Not doin yor jobs!! Shame on yous. Huh.

In Which Our HERO Steals the Kapyooter fer a Whil

Musashi Sez:

This was posted four days ago, but I thinks Mom glitched it because then we cudnt find it. So here it is again.

Okay, I noe it has ben a while, but Mom has been abslootely HOGGIN the kapyooter again. She has this stoopid poetree blog she is writin so when she sends out her book lotsa peeples will buy it. I has been halpin as much as I can, by sittin on her hands to keep them warm whil she is writin or typing. Yer welcom. But now that she is off to the gym to egzercize so her brain dont overheat an get all explody, I can steal back the kapyooter fer a whil.

She leaves the books out an I sit on them an tell her which of the ones she doesnt need to read cuz they are borin. I sitted on this one book all about Greek history from when people ran aroun wearin sheets for some reason. I not unnerstan hoomin peoples, but I wud say bloo jeans are a betterer idear if you jus dont have enough fur.

Also, I has been thinkin about what to do fer spring. I mean I spent a lotsa time persuading ol Jack Frost to halp us get that sno record. Yu kin thank me laters. But if you has idears fer a new evil plot, I cud shur use yer halp.

Mom Sez Enugf Alreddee!

Musashi Sez:

So it turn out that, parentlee, Mom has been reedin mai blog cuz she tolded me recently. ENUGF ALRREDDEE!!! STOP WIFT THE SNO AN SHLEET AND THAT SHTUFFS!

Hnurf. Fine. If you not wants to spend mor time wift me, then fine. Go to yer werk. It notl ik I care. Hrumph.

Mai Macchiavellian Plot: SUCCESS!!!

Musashi Sez:

Wull I noe you has not been hearin much from melately. Partly, that is becuz I has been runnin round the apartmin bein SEVEN! which is a whol lotsa fun. But also it is becuz I has ben runnin a multistate CONSPIRACY, and that is jus egzaustin. See I came up wift this ideer to BRIBE JACK FROST to snow extra in Massachoosits so that our hoomins wud stay hom wift us.

Now, I knoe wut you are thinking: how cud Musashi pull this off ALL BY HISSELF!? Well I didnt. I had lotsa help. Sherlock and Dash Strang sent me some MYSTERY STORIES fer JACK. Pellinore Sobel an his brother sent some unidentifiable VEGETABULTARIAN stuff that we not want to look at too closely, but apprently Jack really liked it. Then Tycho and Kepler Musselman sent a actual GLOBE of the WORLD that spins! 

Iris an Lateegra Thorndike/Breeze were goin to send some vegetabultarian stuff, but we had that covered, so then they sent a BICYCLE instead! And we has been running out of stuffs so I has offered to teach Jack some TIGER KUNG FU. We may need to get other kitteh peeples or even doggies involved if we are goin to keep pulling this off, bur I am perty confident we kin keep this goin till March, at leest.

 

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Musashi Sez:

So mai Mom lovs me So MUTCH, she gotted me a early birftdae prezent, this is a NOO Litter mat shaped like a bone fer some reason). It is shiny an black like me, which is cool, an also, it not catch the litter, which mean it is easier to clean.

I not aksks fer mutch. Actchooly, I asksed Mom fer a tricycle to ride around the partmint, but she said that we would have to see about that and told me to look online fer kittee safety helmets. So far I has not finded any, which is shockin since that means LOTS and LOTS of kittees is biking unsafely.

I think I am goin to invent a Society fer the Promotion and Innovation of Tricycle Helmets for Kitteez. SPITHK. You all kin join!