Mai Macchiavellian Plot: SUCCESS!!!

Musashi Sez:

Wull I noe you has not been hearin much from melately. Partly, that is becuz I has been runnin round the apartmin bein SEVEN! which is a whol lotsa fun. But also it is becuz I has ben runnin a multistate CONSPIRACY, and that is jus egzaustin. See I came up wift this ideer to BRIBE JACK FROST to snow extra in Massachoosits so that our hoomins wud stay hom wift us.

Now, I knoe wut you are thinking: how cud Musashi pull this off ALL BY HISSELF!? Well I didnt. I had lotsa help. Sherlock and Dash Strang sent me some MYSTERY STORIES fer JACK. Pellinore Sobel an his brother sent some unidentifiable VEGETABULTARIAN stuff that we not want to look at too closely, but apprently Jack really liked it. Then Tycho and Kepler Musselman sent a actual GLOBE of the WORLD that spins! 

Iris an Lateegra Thorndike/Breeze were goin to send some vegetabultarian stuff, but we had that covered, so then they sent a BICYCLE instead! And we has been running out of stuffs so I has offered to teach Jack some TIGER KUNG FU. We may need to get other kitteh peeples or even doggies involved if we are goin to keep pulling this off, bur I am perty confident we kin keep this goin till March, at leest.

 

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Musashi Sez:

So mai Mom lovs me So MUTCH, she gotted me a early birftdae prezent, this is a NOO Litter mat shaped like a bone fer some reason). It is shiny an black like me, which is cool, an also, it not catch the litter, which mean it is easier to clean.

I not aksks fer mutch. Actchooly, I asksed Mom fer a tricycle to ride around the partmint, but she said that we would have to see about that and told me to look online fer kittee safety helmets. So far I has not finded any, which is shockin since that means LOTS and LOTS of kittees is biking unsafely.

I think I am goin to invent a Society fer the Promotion and Innovation of Tricycle Helmets for Kitteez. SPITHK. You all kin join!

So Far, So Gud

Musashi Sez:

Well, so far I has been doin pertee gud on the rezolooshun front, altho it has not been easy. I wakes up at like three thirty oclock and I has to NOT WAYK MOM UP fer like whol HOURS until four thirty oclock finally happens on the clock. This is egzausting and often means aftr she leaves fer werk, I has to nap ALL MORNIN. But Mom has mostlee been keepin her rezolooshuns too, so I does not feel so bad about it.

Also, Jack is back!  Hooray! An also Anna, who is teetchin me to cook. I has been playin soccer wift Mom, so I shud be svelte by summertime.  (Mom says gud luck wift that. Thanks, Mom!)

Eventchoolee, I egspekt all this not waking Mom up is goin to get easier. When it does, I intend to make gud yoos of mai extra free time by taking up recreational sneezing.

New Yeer Rezolooshunz

 Musashi Sez:

Well Mom got verree upset with me this morning an she has been makin me writ mai noo yeer rezolooshunz all dae.  So far I got theez ones.

1. I will not trai to wake Mom up at midnigt fer brekfest. (she mayded me write this one like elebenty hundred times. I figger she want me to be sure that I am spellin the words rigt.)

2. I will not trai to wake Mom up until AT LEEST 4:30 in the mornin.

3. I will lern to tell time from the akshual clock.

So thoz are the ones she want me to resoloot. Here are some I has fer her:

1. I will get up an feed MUSASHI the first tim he pat me on the noz.

2. I will not has a cranky if I gets up to feed him an he alreddy has the fud.

Oddly enugf, I has notissed that Mr. Tyger an mai Rhinosersaucerous buddy has boft been findin othr things to do when this subjict comes up. Huh.

Merry Christmus to ALL! (Eevn Mom)

Musashi Sez:

Wull, as yu may noe, I allus has a wild tim partyin wift mai roommates at this tim of yeer, cuz Mom go home to vizit her Mom an Dad (whu are mai Granmom an Granpa erspictively), an she party wift them.

Uzually, ther is lotsa sno fer me to watch out mai windo (in between the wild partyin), but this yeer not so much, an I blame Mom cuz uzually she plan betterer than this.

However, in the innerest of Santa might still be comin, eevn tho we gots no ackshual chimney, I is willing to gives her the benefits of mai considerobble doubt.

So Merry Christmus to all my homies: Mom and Granmom an Granpa an Onkul Ben an Onkul Stan an Ont Lindr an Ont Mishel an Cuzzin Dunkin an Pamlr an everbody whuz name I not noe how to spell.

An to Mistr Tygr, Happy Festivus. We will engaj in feets of strength tomorrer!

Pom Joos an Blog Joos

Musashi Sez:

Well, I has been notising mai moms habits when it comes to her blog, which is a lot about writin in genrul, an about

poetree in partikular. The fact that she writes lotsa poms has maded me wonder how she does the whol productivitee thing. It were a mystree...

Then I realize that mom drinks this pom joos stuffs sometimz. An that explaind everthin!!! If she drink Pom Joos to write them poms, mebbe I cud drink Blog Joos to writ mai blogs!!!

 

Fanbases and Shouldrers

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Musashi Sez:

Wull, I has been thinkin very seriuslee about what Mom seds about my fanbase/audience/  constitchuensee, etc., an I decided that she is probabul rigt. I shud writ mor stuffs, eevn if they are stoopid, cuz that is whut folks expekt from the innerwebs.

In the intrest of this, I am writin todae about my sholders, which are apparentlee lik a futbol players sholders, cuz when I com in the bedroom from the rest of the partmint, I offen make the door go BOOM open an then Mom complain especially if she is gettin dressed into somthin diffrent. Then she say, MUSASHI! Why you do that? Yu no open doors unless you close them afters!!!

But I not do closin of dors. I only opens them. Huh.

This is becuz I beleevs in the openin of opportooniteez an lik that. It a philosophological statement.