Kleenin Up Them ArftrMaths

Musashi/Octavian Sez:

Now that our writr bunneez has had tim to lee-ay-zon wift M in Londin, we kin now updayt yu on the stayt of affayrz in sothern Frans, wher we leftid our hero (whu is kinda me) an mai frendz. But ther is lotsa tecknikul detail an I am jus now recovrin from dansin Conga to “Copacabana” fer the las 10 monfts!!! (This whut happinz wen yer writrz go off an joynz a cult. Huh.) So we’r goin to let Mom/Narraytr Gal, yu noe, narrayts.

Narrator Says:

Actually, Octavian has it backwards. In fact, on September 25, when the folks at the inn started dancing the conga line to the communal frenzied singing of the “Copacabana,” a whol dae after the dans began, our entir pool of writer bunneez hared off to join a cult of rabbit Krishnas in Nebraska, U.S., leeving our heroz, some villains and several dozen arguably innocent frentch citizens and internashunl toorists locked in a 10-monft long temperospatial claudication.

Wift som halp frum the Archaik Ordr of the Librariunz of Alekzandria, M16 wuz able to modify the memoreez of the participants and their naybrz so that they all beleevz they watchd an eg-skroshi-aytin 4-hour long “So Yu Thingk Yu Kin Dans.”

Durin the 9-hour gap between freeing the bunneez an getting to the inn down in sothern Franz, however, the Jamaykin band disapeerd mysteeryuslee. The Libraryunz ar followin up on that end whil M16 werkz on de breefin its agents an their assosiyutz.

A grayt deel of nappin is goin on sins M chewd out Octavian fer messin up a mishun that had been 9 monfts in the maykin. Mos of this nappin is goin on in a (rathr crwdid) dog hous behind a Londin apartmint rentid out near Diagon Alley. Verree lo rent.

But yu din’t heer that frum me.

Bakgrown Reesertch

Musashi Sez:

Accordin to my Mom-—er, Watchr—-we findid this stuffs out abowt our so-calld “Hare-Krishnr” emeneez. Turnz out, they wuzn’t the Reellee Reel Hare Krishnas at all, whu has no connexion wift bunneez. This compound we raydid hadsd nothin to do wift actual rabbit types. Go figger. An them old tomez that Mom keeps on her shalvz told us lots about the bad gyz we wuz figtin (so it turnd out gud that I hadsd to go hom fer my vizit to the vet, cuz I gotst the insyd skup on the fansee bakgrown reesertch! Huh!). The ol buks tol us that:

The Bunny Cult traces its beginnings to the Viking raids of Ireland in the 8th century. Wily rabbits from Trondheim smuggled themselves aboard the outgoing longboats, and alighted on Irish shores slightly nauseous but up for some fun. St. Patrick may have driven all the snakes out of Ireland in the mid-400s, but no one felt much like carrying on the tradition and the Bunnies were allowed to stay.

Wuns we wuz knowin that, we cud tayk them down wift tayzrs an judo an lik that, hah, wiftout havin to worree about mistikul backlash.

The Ancient and Honourable Bunny Cult. 22 June 2011. Web.

Mai Kittee Trahmr/How Thinz Egsplodid Then

Musashi Sez:

So the rescyoo mishun wuz ackomplisht, although I had to go hom in the middul to has mai anyual vizit to the vet. I lik the vet. Her offis has lotsa innersting smells. I eevn lay on the flor an cleend my pawz fer awhile, which surprizd the vet. She sed that kitteez don’t do that mutch, but I am a totallee nonchalant kittee, in the offis at leest. Not the trayn. I NOT lik the trayn. Not not not! It is noizee an trahmattik.

Aneewae, by the tim I gots bak to Nabraska, we hads the Hare Krishna compound suroundid. We put on our ninjr soots an grabbed ou flowr bookays fer camoflage an went in armd fer bunnee.

Our leedr wuz a straynj littul bald gy wift a speech impidimint. Wen the Hare Krishnas saw our amayzin flowrz, they all stoppd whut they wuz doin an caym ovr to sniff. I grabbd my gy an putted him in a full Mason-Dixon, an he kickd lik a kangaroo. I din’t see mutch of whut wuz happinin wift the other ninjr SWAT gyz cuz it wus all I cud do not to let him get awae or, possibutl, disembowl me.

The writr bunneez wuz so graytful to us fer halpin lberayt them, they offerd me a gest star spot on their spy bog, but I sed I’d hav to nap fer a monft or 2 before I cud eevn think about it. Turnz out them akshun mooveez is mutch hardr werk than they looks.

The Thrid Escape

Musashi Sez:

Wull we ben verree bizzee in the las 30 owrz or so, altho yu migts not be aybul to tell. Moslee, it wuz me, Musashi, bein bizzee wift the hollecoptrz an stuff, landin at the higest poynt of the compond of them Hare Krirshnrz whut kitten-napt all them bunneez frum mai buddee, Octavian’s writr pool (the one wiftout the akshul green waddr).

So, yah, we landed on the rooftop an then, cuz it wuz all too mutch fer me wift the noiz an the egsytmint, I went into a 15 minit cays of whut we kitteez call “compozhur groomin” an then I falld asleep fer hors an hors.

But the gud nooz is that, wen I finlee wokd up, mai spy buddeez frum the holicptr wuz reddee to rol

The Sekind Excayp

Musashi Sez:

TEXT to MOMSU: “Wull, this hav ben a verree straynj cupla daez. First, on Toozdae, Mildird an Henree gots awae in a offirs chayr. Then Iodyn gotst caugt. Then Roofus started a Ordr of Holee Suburbin Rabbitst an Tygrz, an they challinjd the Hare Krshnaz to a dool. An that reellee dint go well fer anneebodee, altho ther wuz som fun watchin the lansiz shin in the sun.”

Akshul MUSashI messijin: Oboy, this hollociptr thin is maykin me feel lik barfin mai hairballz on somboddee’z feets. We has ben scirklin roun abov the Hare Krshnr’s compound fer lik all dae, an I is soopr dizzee. Ther wer another braykout arroun noon. I gess the fud isn’t too gud.

Meanwhil, we has called in the Nooz Corp, but they has ben verree bizzee wift a flood. That okay. We kin wayt a dae or too.

The Firsts Excayp

Musashi Sez:

Wull, collr me blond! Heer I iz, lernin about mai altr eego, Octayvian’z, werld. An it tern out to be daynjerus an skayree an verree classee, whitch not mayk mutch sens to me.

But, as they sez in the buks, I had bettr go bak.

Mom an me hadz ben getting theez straynj poscards frum, we thinkd, bunneez in trubbul. So we sent a messij to our frendz in Inglund, whu is so gud at the straynj stuffs. An we getst bak a messij that I—me—Musashi!— had to perpayr fer HelloCoptr fligt—an mai Mom hadsd to do resertch an develipmint an lik that. All this wuz pertee skaree fer us boft, cuz we onlee do the duo thin, wift eetch othr, not wift spaiz an them.

An meanwhil, durin this skaree tim, we gets yet a nuthr poscard, whut sez:

HOP! Mildird an Henree gots out on a delux chayr-thin, wift weelz. Iodyn gotst caugt an we is reddee to riot to gets her owt. We neeeedz 8. We gastaaa--

Doin the Teknoledjee Thin

Musashi Sez:

Wull, so we has Sekyoori-Textid® Ayjint 8 an his Boss, M. They has not gottid bak to us yet. We thinks that eethr 1) they is bizzee getting 8 out from his trubbul, 2) they is havin lots of them chikkintaylz wift the littul umbrellrz in them at formul settins, or possibul 3) they has not ben chekkin their emaylz laytlee.

So. Now me an mom, an also Mistr Tygr, my wrastlin cotch, an Octo-Moussee, an lik that, has got to simplee sayv the Bunnee Writrz ourselves.

Huh.